Men And Women jokes

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Men And Women


a man walks out of a bar totally hammered...
 
 
A man walks out of a bar totally hammered, only to be greeted by a snobby woman. She takes one look at him.

"You, sir, are drunk!"

"And you ma'am, are ugly. But when I wake up, I will be sober!"

condoms and women
 
 
What do condoms and women have in common?

Both spend more time in a guy's wallet than on his cock.

porsche and hedgehog
 
 
What's the difference between a porsche and a hedgehog?

A hedgehog has its pricks on the outside.

what, no golden goose?
 
 
A man comes home late one night, drunk.
"Where have you been?" asks his wife.
"In the Golden Bar! They have golden chairs, golden glasses, golden beer, and a golden urinal!" This sounds awfully suspicious to the wife, who calls the Golden Bar.
"Do you have golden chairs?"
"Yes."
"Do you have golden glasses?"
"Yes."
"Do you have golden beer?"
"Yes."
"Do you have a golden urinal?"
"Hold on." On the other end, she hears "I think we have a line on the guy who pissed in your saxophone."

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