Men And Women jokes

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Men And Women


no speaking
 
 
I haven't spoken to my wife in nearly 18 months — I don't want to interrupt her!
350 pounder?
 
 
What do you call a 350-pound stripper?

Broke!

the waiting room
 
 
This woman is rushed to the hospital in critical condition. Her husband waits patiently in the waiting room. After a few minutes, the doctor comes out and asks her assistant for a wrench, which understandably concerns the husband.

Then, after a couple more moments, the doctor re-enters the room this time asking for a screwdriver. The man grows worried and begins to pace in circles.

Then, a little later, the doctor bursts through the doors screaming for a hammer, at that, the husband, in a state of frenzied terror, runs up to the surgeon and asks, 'Doctor, what the heck is wrong with my wife?'

"I don't know," replies the flustered doctor, "I can't get my damn bag open."

futurama
 
 
How does a man plan for the future? He buys TWO cases of beer.

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