Men And Women jokes

Belts. Women use belts an an accessory, guys use belts to perch their pants precariously on their crack.
Hats. Same deal. Do women need them? No. Why? Because there is a choice, when you are having a bad hair day, you can (A) Spend 45 minutes in the bathroom dousing your hair with chemicals and goos, or (B) Toss on a hat to cover up the nasty hair.
Socks. Guys wear white gymsocks, females have to go and wear pink and purple frilly puffy socks. Socks thinner than public restroom toilet paper. I mean c'mon ladies, when you're wearing pants does the color or the socks really matter?
Bracelets. Who thought up these things? These are worse than Minesweeper for wasting time. You can jingle them, and you can play with them, they aren't good for much else!
Creams/Lotions/Oinments. Why do females have 19 different exfoliation creams? I mean c'mon, it just clutters up the countertop in the bathroom. A guy's bathroom: soap, razor, shaving cream, deoderant, and some tough actin' Tinactin. A woman's, oh God. I wont even get into that.

How many men does it take to put down a toilet seat?

I don't know, it's never been done.

Why doesn't a woman need a car?
Because you don't need a car to get from the bedroom to the kitchen.

Why is there a flap on the back of the Navy uniform?

For the Marine to hold on to!