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the other side
 
 
Once upon a time, there was a river. The Nile River, to be exact. On one side of the river lived the rabbit, and on the other side lived the bear. One fine day, the bear was sitting on a stump, enjoying his breakfest of berries. Then he heard someone yelling at him. It was the rabbit.

'Hey! Hey, Teddy, get your butt over here. I've got something to show you!'

'Not now! I'm eating.'

'Oh come on!' said the rabbit. 'It's really important.'

'No way.'

'Please. It's urgent.'

So the bear decided to go all the way over the wide river. It took him all day and all night to get over to the other side. He nearly drowned. And when he finally got there he was groaning and panting, and wheezing for air.

'Well, rabbit,' he panted. 'What did you want to tell me?'

'Hey, Teddy,' the rabbit began, 'look how many berries are on the other side of the river.'

stumpy legged pink dog
 
 
A guy walks into a bar with his dog on a leash the barman says, “Geez that's a weird dog: he's stumpy-legged, pink, and doesn't have a tail, but I bet my rottweiler would beat the heck out of it.”

50 bucks is laid down. Out in the yard the rottweiler gets mauled to pieces.

Another drinker says his pit bull will win but the bet is 100 bucks.

Another trip to the yard and when it's all over there are bits of pit-bull terrier all over the place. The drinker pays up and says, “Say what breed is that anyway?”

The owner says, “Until I cut his tail off and painted it pink it was the same breed as every other alligator.”

fly away
 
 
What do you call a fly in a blonde's brain?

A space invader!

dogs and dem womenfolk
 
 
What's the difference between a dog barking on the front porch and a woman yelling on the back porch?
The dog quits barking when you let it in!

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