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amorous amish people! kinky!
 
 
An Amish couple had just been married and had gone to a hotel for their honeymoon. The Amish man went to the front desk and asked for a room. He said this occasion was very special to them and they needed a good room. The clerk asked if he wanted the bridal. The Amish fellow thought about it a while and then replied, 'No, I guess not, I'll just hold onto her ears until she gets used to it.'
bush has a short one
 
 
Bush has a short one. Gorbachev has a long one. Madonna does not have one. And a priest does not use his. What is it?

A last name.

signs you've had too much of the '90s
 
 
1. Your reason for not staying in touch with family is that they do not have email addresses.

2. If you can't order it by midnight and have it delivered by noon the next day, it is just too slow.

3. Your Stockbroker's name ends in '.com'

4. A Blind date means chatting online with someone you haven't met before.

5. Keeping up with sports means having your favorite sports teams bookmarked

6. You lecture the neighborhood kids selling lemonade on ways to improve their efficiency

7. You get all excited when it's Saturday and you can wear sweats to work.

8. You find you really need Power Point to explain what kind of work you do.

9. You normally eat out of vending machines and at the most expensive restaurant in town within the same week.

10. You apologize to your friends who didn't get holiday cards from you. “Sorry, I only sent ‘e-cards’ this year, you just didn't make the cut”

11. You think a “half-day” means leaving at 5 o'clock.

12. You get most of your jokes via email instead of in person.
christmas chimney congestion
 
 
Q: Why doesn't Santa have any children?

A: Because he only comes once a year and when he does it's down a chimney.


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