Whatever jokes

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"Do you ever get horny?" said one widow to the other.
"What do you do about it?"
"I suck on a lifesaver."
"Oh. That works?"
"What beach do you go to?"
the pig with the wooden leg
There was a tourist on a farm and he asked the farmer why one pig had a wooden leg.

The farmer said, 'That pig is the bravest pig I ever saw.'

'So why does he have a wooden leg?' the tourist asked.

'Well one night our house caught on fire. And he came into our house and he woke us all up.'

'So,' the tourist asked again, 'why does that pig have a wooden leg?'

'Well, a pig that brave you can't eat all at once!'

let them eat homework
Why'd the boy eat his homework?

His teacher told him it was a piece of cake!

Q: How many divorced men does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: None, because they never get the house!

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