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party!
 
 
Question: If you went to a party and woke up with a condom in your ass would you tell anyone?

Answer: No!

Response: Wanna go to a party?

helen keller...masturbation
 
 
How did Hellen Keller discover masturbation?

Trying to read her own lips.
baseball for scotsmen
 
 
A recent Scottish immigrant attends his first baseball game in his new country and after a base hit he hears the fans roaring "Run....run!"

The next batter connects heavily with the ball and the Scotsman stands up and roars with the crowd in his thick accent: "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-run will ya!"

A third batter slams a hit and again the Scotsman, obviously pleased with his knowledge of the game, screams: "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-r-run will ya!"

The next batter held his swing at three and two and as the ump calls a walk. The Scotsman stands up yelling: "R-r-run ya Bahstard, r-r-run!" All the surrounding fans chuckle quietly and he sits down confused. A friendly fan, sensing his embarrassment whispers, "He doesn't have to run, he got four balls."

"Walk with pr-r-ride man!"

f-a-r-m
 
 
How does a blonde spell "farm?"

E-I-E-I-O!!


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