Whatever jokes

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Whatever


unemployed cowboy
 
 
Q: Why did the bowlegged cowboy get fired?

A: Because he couldn't keep his calves together!
face sabbatical
 
 
Can I borrow your face for a few days?

My ass is on vacation.

things just fallin' off
 
 
This morning as I was buttoning my shirt, a button fell off. After that, I picked up my briefcase, and the handle fell off. Then I went to open the door, and the doorknob fell off. I went to get into my car, and the door handle came off in my hand. Now I'm afraid to pee.
grandma's nuts
 
 
A guy goes to visit his grandmother and he brings his friend with him.

While he's talking to his grandmother, his friend starts eating the peanuts on the coffee table, and finished them off.

As they're leaving, his friend says to his grandmother, "Thanks for the peanuts."

She says, "Yeah, since I lost my dentures I can only suck the chocolate off them."


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