Whatever jokes

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Whatever


wallpaper
 
 
How many men does it take to wallpaper a room?

It depends how thinly you slice them!
slightly used car
 
 
A man was selling his brand-new luxury car for ten dollars. A woman answered the ad, but she was slightly disbelieving.

'Ten bucks?!? What's the gimmick?' she inquired.

'No gimmick,' the man answered. 'My wife died, and in her will she asked that the car be sold and that all the money go to the mailman.'

w.t.
 
 
What do you call a hiker who likes to gossip?

A walkie-talkie.
terrible accident
 
 
A cop comes around a curve in the road and sees a bad accident.
A man and a woman are both dead from a car crash. The accident seems to have no explanation, but he looks up on the hill and sees a monkey waving his arms at him as if to say something. The cop says, "Hey, monkey, you know what happened?"

The monkey mimes drinking a bottle of some kind. "They were drinking? What else?"
The monkey mimes smoking a joint. "They were smoking dope? There must have been more. This is a very strange accident. Monkey! What else?"

The monkey mimes sexual relations. "They were screwing? This still doesn't make any sense. Hey monkey! What were you doing to know all this?"
Monkey mimes driving and looking behind him...


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