Whatever jokes

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what's worse?
What's worse than having termites in your piano?

Crabs on your organ.

a prayer before dying
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
lesbians, diets, and makeup
Why don't lesbians go on diets and wear makeup at the same time?

It's hard to be on Jenny Craig when you've got Liz Clairborne on your face!

math book talk
What did one math book say to the other math book?

I have a lot of problems!

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