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mime in a forest
 
 
A mime is walking aimlessly through a forest.

A tree falls on him.

Does anyone care?
funny business
 
 
A man is opening a restaurant and he asks one of his workers to come up with a name for it.

The man tells Al, one of his workers, that he will name the resaurant after the first thing Al sees when he goes out the door.

Al walks outside and the first thing he saw was a girl named Lucy and he saw her legs. He told the man, and so the restaurant was named Lucy's Legs. The man was so impressed that he said the next day Al could get a free drink.

The next day Al comes a bit early and a policeman walks by and notices Al waiting there. The policeman asks, "What are you doing?"

Al says, "I'm waiting for Lucy's legs to open so I can get a drink."

one honda
 
 
How many people can you fit in one Honda?

Well, the Bible said that all 12 disciples were in one Accord.....
signs you are growing older
 
 
    You sink your teeth into a steak and they stay there.
  1. You turn off the lights for economical reasons, not romantic ones.
  2. You read the obituaries to find eligible women.
  3. Old ladies offer to help you cross the street.
  4. Everything hurts and what doesn't hurt, doesn't work.
  5. The gleam in your eye is from the sun hitting your bifocals.
  6. A beautiful girl walks by and nothing happens.
  7. You have all the answers but nobody is asking you the questions.
  8. You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going.
  9. All the names in your little black book end with MD.

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