Whatever jokes

Jokes » whatever » jokes 282

Whatever


jesus gives speech
 
 
Jesus was standing on a hill talking to his people.
'He who hath not sinned, cast the first stone." Just then a stone came flying from the back of the crowd and hit him hard on the head.
'Ouch, Mom! I hate when you do that!"
hanky
 
 
Q: How can you make a very lively hankerchief?
A: Put a little boogey in it
it happened at 40,000 feet
 
 
While cruising at 40,000 feet, the airplane shuddered and Mr. Benson looked out the window.

"Good Lord!" he screamed. "One of the engines just blew up!"

Other passengers left their seats and came running over. Suddenly, the aircraft was rocked by a second blast as yet another engine exploded on the other side. The passengers were in a panic now, and even the stewardesses couldn't maintain order!

Just then, standing tall and smiling confidently, the pilot strode from the cockpit and assured everyone that there was nothing to worry about. Most of the passengers seemed to feel better on hearing this, and they sat down as the pilot walked to the front of the aircraft. There, he grabbed several packages from under the seats and began handing them to the flight attendants. Each crewmember attached the package to their backs.

"Say," spoke up an alert passenger, "aren't those parachutes?"

The pilot said, "Yes, they are."

The passenger went on, "But I thought you said there was nothing to worry about?"

"There isn't," replied the pilot as a third engine exploded.

"We're just going to get help."

arkansas toothbrush
 
 
How do you know that the toothbrush was invented by a redneck?

If it was invented by anyone else they would have called it a "teethbrush".


Page 283 of 497     «« Previous | Next »»