Whatever jokes

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bucket of what?
 
 
What's the difference between a bucket of crap and a mother-in-law?

The bucket!

i went to the bank
 
 
I went to the bank last week and said to the cashier, "can you check my balance please?"

She pushed me over!
in the groove
 
 
A hippie saunters into an urban Bar & Grill and orders a cheeseburger.

"But make sure to make it not too well done, not too rare, but just in the groove." The waiter is a little annoyed at this, but serves him the burger.

"Waiter!" the hippie says after a little bit. "Could I get a cup of tea? Not too weak, not too strong, but just in the groove." More annoyed now, the waiter contemplates pissing in the tea, but doesn't.

"Waiter!" the hippies says a little later. "Could I get some ice cream? Not too chocolate, not too vanilla, but just in the groove."

"Wait," said the waiter. "I have another idea. How 'bout you kiss my ass? Not too much to the right, not too much to the left, but just in the groove."

stumpy the dog
 
 
Where do you find a no legged dog?

Right where you left him.

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