Whatever jokes

Jokes » whatever » jokes 465


let's play monkey in the tree
Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree?

'Cause he was dead!

pad talking
What did the maxi pad say to the fart?

You are the wind beneath my wings.

windows 666
Bill Gates dies, and ascends to the Pearly Gates to meet God. God immediately recognizes him and says to him "Bill Gates -- you're a great man. I shall give you a choice of either heaven or hell." Bill Gates tells God that he would like to see both before making a decision.

So God takes Bill Gates down to Hell, where there are beautiful, nubile bikini models, perfect weather, free drinks, and eternal happiness. "That doesn't seem so bad," says Gates. "Let's see Heaven now." God and Gates go to Heaven, which seems to be just a bunch of old, crusty angels flying around and sitting on a few clouds. "I've made my decision," says Gates. "I choose Hell."

Six months later, God goes down to Hell to check on him and finds him hanging above a pit of fire with wild harpies tearing out his intestines. "What happened to all the bikini models and the sun and the fun?" Gates screams. "Oh, that," says God. "That was just the demo."

definition of suspicious
What is the definition of suspicious?

A nun doing sit-ups in a cucumber field.

Page 466 of 497     «« Previous | Next »»