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it was so cold today i saw a lawyer with his ...
 
 
It was so cold today I saw a lawyer with his hands in his own pockets.
hot tomato
 
 
Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!


 
 
"Some plants," said the teacher, "have the prefix "dog. For instance, there is the dogrose, the dogwood, the dogviolet. Now name another plant prefixed by 'dog'."

"I can," shouted a blonde, "Collieflower!"

"cocaine is a hell of a drug"
 
 
Two guys are picked up by cops for drugs and are given the oppurtunity to walk only if they convince ten other guys not to do drugs. They both agree and set off. The first male comes back and says "I got the ten guys, but it wasn't easy". The cop asks how he did it. "I drew a large circle and then a small circle and said the large circle was your brain and the small circle was your brain on drugs." The second male comes back and says "I got 42 guys to quit drugs!" The cop impressed, asks how did he do it? "Well basically the same system as the first guy but I drew the small circle first and said, "You see the small circle is your butt hole before you go to jail and the large circle is after you have been to jail."

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