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The agent replied, "I'm sorry, sir. I'll be happy to try to help you, but I've got to help these folks first, and I'm sure we'll be able to work something out."
The passenger was unimpressed. He SCREAMED, so that the passengers behind him could hear, "Do you have ANY idea who I am?"
Without hesitating, the gate agent smiled and grabbed her public address microphone.
"May I have your attention, please?" she began, her voice bellowing throughout the terminal. "We have a passenger here at the gate WHO DOES NOT KNOW WHO HE IS. If anyone can help him find his identity, please come to gate 17."
With the people behind him in line laughing hysterically, the man glared at the airline agent, gritted his teeth, and swore, "Screw you."
Without flinching, she smiled and replied, "I'm sorry, sir, but you'll have to stand in line for that, too."
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Who's there?
Katmandu
Katmandu who?
Katmandu what Catwoman wants!
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Three friends die in a car accident and they go to an orientation in heaven. They are all asked, "When you are in your casket and your friends and family are mourning you, what would you like to hear them say about you?"
The first guy says,"I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor of my time, and a great family man."
The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband and a schoolteacher who made a huge difference in our children of tomorrow."
The last guy replies, "I would like to hear them say... LOOK, HE'S MOVING!"
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