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when can i get that haircut?
 
 

A guy sticks his head into a barber shop and asks, "how long before I can get a haircut?"

The barber looks around the shop and says, "About two hours." The guy leaves. A few days later, the same guy sticks his head in the door and asks, "how long before I can get a haircut? The barber looks around at shop full of customers and says, "About two hours." The guy leaves.

A week later, the same guy sticks his head in the shop and asks, "How long before I can get a haircut?" The barber looks around the shop and says, "about an hour and a half." The guy leaves.

The barber looks over at a friend in the shop and says, "Hey, Bill, follow that guy and see where he goes". In a little while, Bill comes back into the shop, laughing hysterically.

The barber asks, "Bill, where did he go when he left here?" Bill looked up and said, "to your house."

you sinner!!!!!!!
 
 
A conscience does not prevent sin; it only prevents you from enjoying it.
rabbit breakout
 
 
Three rabbits escape from a testing lab and find an entire field full of carrots. They eat themselves into a stupor and sleep throughout the night. The next morning, they find an entire field full of female rabbits with no males in sight. They screw themselves into a stupor and sleep throughout the night. The next morning, the rabbits get to talking.

"I'm gonna go back to that field of carrots," says one.

"I'm gonna go back to those cute little rabbits," says the second.

"I'm going back to the lab," says the third. "I'm dying for a cigarette."

i need glasses. do i ever
 
 
"Doctor, doctor! I need glasses!"

"You certainly do, ma'am. This is a barber shop."


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