Whatever jokes

Jokes » whatever » jokes 174

Whatever


how to urn bennys
 
 
There was a man named Benny who loved to take walks on the beach. One day he found a bottle with a genie in it. He let the genie out.
The genie was so grateful that he granted him one wish with the condition that he never shave again, otherwise he'd turn him into an urn.
Benny got his wish of riches and fame but he kept tripping over his long beard which he hadn't shaved in 30 years. Benny said to himself, “that genie isn't around anymore, I'm shaving.” With that, he went home and shaved. Instantly he went 'POOF' and turned into an urn.
Moral to the story: A Benny shaved is a Benny urn-ed.
elephant encounter
 
 
Q: What should you do if you come across an elephant?

A: Apologize and wipe it off.
put it on your organ
 
 
One day Reverend Smith went to visit Mrs. Jenkins, one of the elder parishoners in his church. When he arrived she asked him to wait in the parlor while she went to the kitchen to get refreshments for their visit. Reverend Smith, while waiting in the parlor, happened to notice that on top of Mrs. Jenkins' organ was sitting a bowl which contained a condom floating in water.

Now Reverend Smith was very befuddled and after Mrs. Jenkins returned he couldn't help himself and asked her to explain this to him.

"Oh, Reverend Smith," she replied, "I found that lying on the street corner and the package said that if you put it on your organ and keep it wet that it will prevent disease and frankly, I haven't been sick all year."

snowmen and snowwomen
 
 
What's the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?

Snowballs! Ha!


Page 175 of 497     «« Previous | Next »»