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To: Departmental Heads
'On Friday evening at 5 p.m., Halley's Comet will be visible in this areaan event which occurs only once every 76 years. Please have the employees assemble in the park area outside the building and I will explain this rare phenomenon to them. In case of rain, we will not be able to see anything, so assemble the employees in the canteen and I will show them a film of it.'
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From: Departmental Heads
To: Deputy Departmental Heads
'By order of the General Manager on Friday at 5p.m., Halley's Comet will appear above the area outside the building. If it rains, please assemble the employees and proceed to the canteen, where this rare phenomenon will take place, something which occurs only every 76 years'
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From: Deputy Departmental Heads
To: Superintendent
'By the order of the General Manager, at 5 p.m. on Friday, the phenomenal Halley's comet will appear in the canteen. In case of rain in the area outside the building, the General Manager will give another order, something which occurs only once every 76 years.'
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From: Superintendent
To: Foreman
'On Friday at 5 p.m., the General Manager will appear in the canteen with Halley's Comet, something which happens every 76 years. But if it rains, the General Manager will order the comet into the area outside the building.'
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From: Foreman
To: Team Leader
'When it rains on Friday at 5 p.m., the phenomenal 76 year old Bill Halley, accompanied by his comets, will drive the General Manger through the area outside the building into the canteen.'
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"Who was the first man?" asked Peter.
"Adam."
"That's correct. Enter." Soon another man came along.
"Where did Adam and Eve live?"
"Eden."
That's correct. Enter." Then Mother Theresa came along.
"Ooh, I'll have to give you a hard one. What did Eve say when she met Adam for the first time?"
"Mmm, that IS a hard one."
"Enter."
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He was performing the highlight of his show when a parrot walked onstage and squawked, 'It's in his sleeve!'
The magician chased the bird away.
The next day the magician was performing his highlight again (in front of a smaller audience) when the parrot walked onstage and declared, 'It's in his pocket!'
The next day, as he was performing the highlight, he saw the parrot in the crowd. But before the parrot could ruin the magic trick, the boat crashed into a rock and sank.
The magician was lucky enough to find a board to hang on to. On the other end of the board was the parrot.
They stared at each other for three full days, neither of them saying anything, when suddenly the parrot said, 'I give up, what'd you do with the ship?'
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and it spoiled your day.
Look at the bright side,
She's a really good lay!
2) My tire was thumping,
I thought it was flat.
When I loooked at the tire,
I noticed your cat.
Sorry!
3) You had your bladder removed,
and you're on the mends.
Here's a bouquet of flowers
And a box of Depends.
4) You've announced that you're gay,
Won't that be a laugh,
When they find out you're one
Of the Joint Chiefs of Staff!
5) Happy Vasectomy!
Hope you feel zippy!
'Cause when I had mine
I got real snippy!
6) Heard your wife left you.
How upset you must be,
But don't fret about it,
She moved in with me!
7) You totaled your car
And can't remember why.
Could it have been
that case of Bud Dry?
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