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over 60 with aids
Senior citizens are riddled with AIDS!

...hearing aids, Band-Aids, Rolaids, walking aids, government aid.


social security applicant
The elderly man told his wife he was going to sign up for social security. She says, 'You can't do that, you lost your birth certificate.'
He says, 'Oh I'll talk them into it.'

So when he returns the next day, he is all smiles and says, 'I'm all signed up and no problems.' '
Well, how did you do that?' she asks.
He replies, 'I took off my shirt and showed her all the gray hair on my chest, and showed her all the gray hair on my head.'
The wife states, 'Well, why didn't you drop your pants, we could have gotten disability.'

white, slimy, & horny
What's white, slimy, and horny all over?

Gary Condit!

soccer blonde
A blonde began a job as an elementary school counselor and she was eager to help. One day during recess she noticed a girl standing by herself on one side of a playing field while the rest of the kids enjoyed a game of soccer at the other.

The blonde approached and asked if she was all right.

The girl said she was.

A little while later, however, Sandy noticed the girl was in the same spot, still by herself. Approaching again, Sandy offered, "Would you like me to be your friend?"

The girl hesitated, then said, "Okay," looking at the woman suspiciously.

Feeling she was making progress, the blonde then asked, "Why are you standing here all alone?"

"Because," the little girl said with great exasperation, "I'm the goalie!"

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