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2 weeks to live
 
 
A man goes to the doctor and gets a check up. The doctor finishes the exam and tells the man, "I have some bad news, you only have have about two weeks left to live".

The man is shocked. He asks the doctor, "Is there is any thing that he could do to make the time that I have left more tolerable?"

The doctor thinks for a moment. "There is one thing that you could do".

"Just name it, I'll do whatever it is". He tells the man to take alot of mud baths, two or three a day.

The man looks at his doctor asks, "Will that help my condition"?

The doctor says, "No, but it will get you used to the dirt."

what's rough and hairy?
 
 
Q: What's rough and hairy on the outside, soft and wet on the inside, starts with a c, ends with a t, and has a u and an n in it?

A: A coconut.
tennessee divorce
 
 
Q: What do a Texas tornado and a Tennessee divorce have in common?

A: Someone is going to lose a trailer.
national anthem
 
 
Q: What is the new Cuban national anthem?

A: “Row, Row, Row Your Boat.”

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