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confucius pocket talk
 
 
Confucius says, 'Man with hole in his pocket feels cocky all day."
widow for one year
 
 
One day three women were at a beauty parlor talking about their husbands. The first woman says, 'Last night my husband said he was going to his office, but when I called they said he wasn't there!'

'I know!' the next woman says, 'Last night my husband said he was going to his brother's house but when I called he wasn't there.'

The third woman says, 'I always know where my husband is.'

'Impossible!' both women say, 'He has you completely fooled!'

'Oh no,' says the woman. 'I'm a widow.'
guns 'n' mimes
 
 
If a mime shoots you, must he use a silencer?
octopus love
 
 
What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?

I want to hold your hand hand hand hand hand hand hand hand....

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