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lightbulb... harvard
 
 
How many Harvard girls does it take to change a lightbulb?

It's Radcliffe. It's women. And it's not funny!

drinking buddies
 
 
Two men are sitting next to each other in an Irish-style pub in New York City. They both order pints of Guinness. One of them turns to the other and says "So where are you from, then?"

"I'm from Ireland."

"Me too! I'll drink to that." They both finish their pints and order two more.

"Where in Ireland are you from?"

"Dublin."

"Me too! I'll drink to that." They both finish their pints and order two more.

"Where in Dublin are you from?"

"The East Side."

"The East Side? Me too! What a coincidence! I'll drink to that!" They both finish their pints and order two more.

"Where on the East Side are you from?"

"McDonagh Street."

"Me too! This is incredible! I'll drink to that."

As the bartender pours them another two pints, another customer at the bar says to him, "That's amazing! I can't believe they're from the same street in Dublin. What's going on?"

"Oh, it's nothing amazing," says the bartender,"it's just the Ferguson twins getting sloshed again."

time on your hands?
 
 
Call a bowling alley, and ask, “Do you have 10 lb. balls?”
When the attendent says yes, ask, “Then how the hell do you walk?”
zen sausage
 
 
Said the Buddhist to the hot dog vendor: "Make me one with everything."

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