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van gogh's relatives
After much careful research, it has been discovered that the artist Vincent Van Gogh had many relatives. Among them were:

His obnoxious brother: Please Gogh

His dizzy aunt: Verti Gogh

The brother who ate prunes: Gotta Gogh

The constipated uncle: Can't Gogh

The brother who worked at a convenience store: Stop'n Gogh

The grandfather from Yugoslavia: U Gogh

The brother who bleached his clothes white: Hue Gogh

The cousin in Illinois: Chica Gogh

His magician uncle: Wherediddy Gogh

His Italian uncle: Day Gogh

His Mexican cousin: Amee Gogh

The Mexican cousin's American half-brother: Grin Gogh

The ballroom dancing aunt: Tan Gogh

A sister who loved disco: Go Gogh

The bird lover uncle: Flamin Gogh

His nephew psychoanalyst: E Gogh

The fruit loving cousin: Man Gogh

An aunt who taught positive thinking: Wayto Gogh

The little bouncy nephew: Poe Gogh

His niece who travels the country in a van: Winnie Bay Gogh.
your mama's glasses
Your mama's glasses are so thick that when she lookes on a map she can see people waving.
there is a navy guy and a marine...
There is a Navy guy and a Marine in the washroom. The Marine goes to leave without washing up. The sailor catches up with him later and says, "In the Navy, they teach us to wash our hands."

The Marine replies, "In the Marines, they teach us not to pee on ours!!!"

yankee doodle handy
Yankee Doodle went to town
A-riding on his mother

Every time he hit a bump

He had another brother!

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