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the end is near
A priest and pastor from the local parishes are standing by the side of the road holding up a sign that reads, "The End is Near! Turn yourself around now before it's too late!" They planned to hold up the sign to each passing car.

"Leave us alone you religious nuts!" yelled the first driver as he sped by. From around the curve they heard screeching tires and a big splash.

"Do you think," said one clergy to the other, "we should just put up a sign that says 'Bridge Out' instead?"

lighten it up
Q: Why do fireflies light up while they are having sex?

A: Because they are so turned-on!
q: how do crazy people go through the ...
Q: How do crazy people go through the forest?

A: They take the psycho path.

it's not genetics
Why can't Chinese couples have white babies?

Because two Wongs don't make a white!

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