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why did the blonde get fired...
 
 
Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?

She was throwing away all the W's.

first class
 
 
A blonde was headed to Detroit. She got on the plane and sat down in first class.
A few minutes later, a flight attendent came up to her and told her that her ticket was for coach and she had to move from the seat. She refused. The flight attendent was persistant, but the blonde replied, "No, I want to sit here, I've always wanted to see what it is like in first class."

The flight attendent was getting frustrated. Finally, after quite some time, she convinced her to move.

Another passenger who overheard the conversation asked the attendent, "How did you get her to move?"

The flight attendent replied, "I told her that first class doesn't stop in Detroit."

blonde bet
 
 
A blonde and a brunette are in a bar. As they order their drinks, they watch the 6 o' clock news. On the broadcast is a man about to jump from a building. Hours pass as they find themselves sitting in the same seats at the bar watching the 10 o' clock news. The brunette says to the blonde, "I bet you $20 that the man jumps." Thinking for a moment, the blonde takes the bet. Sure enough the man jumps. As the blonde reaches into her purse to pay the bet, she says, "My God, I just saw that same man on the 6 o'clock news, I didn't think he would jump again."
redneck christmas shopping
 
 
You know you're a redneck when...

you go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend and only come back with one gift.


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