Whatever jokes

Jokes » whatever » jokes 434

Whatever


improvements in hell
 
 
An engineer died and ended up in Hell. He was not pleased with the level of comfort in Hell, and began to redesign and build improvements. After a while, they had toilets that flush, air conditioning, and escalators. Everyone grew very fond of him.

One day God called to Satan to mock him, "So, how's it going down there in Hell?"

Satan replied, "Hey, things are great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."

God was surprised, "What? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake. He should never have gotten down there in the first place. Send him back up here."

"No way," replied Satan. "I like having an engineer, and I'm keeping him."

God threatened, "Send him back up here now or I'll sue!"

Satan laughed and answered, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"

mad cows
 
 
Two cows were talking in the field. One cow says, "Have you heard about the Mad Cow disease that's going around?"

The other cow answers, "Yeah, makes you glad you're a penguin, doesn't it?"

bombing works
 
 
We have come to learn that bombing really works. We've flown over 2,800 sorties, dropped 15 tons in warheads, and done extereme amounts of costly damage. But we're a compassionate nation, and when this is all over, we're going to put the rocks and dirt back.
i'm a barbie girl
 
 
What does a Barbie Doll and Britney Spears have in common?
They're both 100 percent plastic.

Page 435 of 497     «« Previous | Next »»