Whatever jokes

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pizza, pizza
A guy ordered a pizza, and Luigi behind the counter asked him if he wanted his pizza in 4 slices or 8.
"Better make it four, 'cause I really can't finish 8 slices."
swicth hands
At a high school an English teacher is busy with work as a student approaches the teacher and asks when the test final test will be. She tells the whole class and a smart-ass jock raises his hand.

"What if that day I just stayed home because I was sexually exahausted?"

"Well, I guess you'd just have to use your other hand to write with."

a ham sandwich walks into a bar...
A ham sandwich walks into a bar.

The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve food here."

blank willow
A man was walking through the forest, when he suddenly has an urge to take a piss. He came upon a field of buttercups. Thinking no one was looking, he immediately relieved himself all over the buttercups. Unbeknownst to him, Mother Nature saw the whole thing and became furious. "How dare you!", she cried, "Just for that, you won't get any butter for a whole year!" "Oh Mother Nature!", the man cried, "In that case, thank God I didn't piss all over the pussywillows!"

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