Whatever jokes

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Whatever


things that make you say damn!
 
 
10) When people go the speed limit in the fast lane

9) When you just can't seem to get a green light when you're in a hurry.

8) When the police speed in regular traffic, but go the speed limit in emergencies.

7) When police or firemen turn their sirens and lights on just to get past the red light.

6) When their is nothing in the fridge when you're hungry, but when you're full, so is the fridge.

5) When, on the toilet, you go to reach for the toilet paper and....

4) Bob Costas.

3) When the gas prices go up in the summer when you need to use the A/C.

2) When the police pull you over, and you realize you forgot to take the reefer out of your ashtray.

1) When you go to pull the trigger to save your own life, and the gun just goes 'click.'
big red
 
 
A Russian couple were walking down a street in Moscow one night when the man felt a drop hit his nose.

"I think it's raining," he said to his wife.

"No that felt like snow to me, dear," she replied.

"No I'm sure it was just rain," he said. They were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing. Just then, they saw a minor communist party official walking towards them.

"Let's not fight about it," the man said. "Let's ask Comrade Rudolph whether its officially raining or snowing." As the man approached the husband said:

"Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it raining or snowing?"

"It's raining, of course" he replied and walked on. But the woman insisted.

"I know that felt like snow!"

To which the man quietly said, "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."

harry potter quiz
 
 
What did Harry Potter do when he found the three-headed dog?

He ran... wouldn't you?

car fun
 
 
When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a parking lot.


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