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escaped midget!
 
 
What do you call a psychic midget who just escaped from jail?

A small medium at large!
dumb crossing
 
 
A highway patrol officer was driving up a mountain road and saw a car stop on the road. He pulled up behind the car.

As he approched the car he saw a dopey looking guy sitting behind the wheel, staring out the front window. The patrolman asked, "Sir, are you ok? Why did you stop in the middle of the road."

The guy said, "Well, the sign back there said, 'Look out for Deer Crossing.' So I stopped and those dam deer still haven't crossed."

pizza, pizza
 
 
A guy ordered a pizza, and Luigi behind the counter asked him if he wanted his pizza in 4 slices or 8.
"Better make it four, 'cause I really can't finish 8 slices."
mouth but no teeth
 
 
What has a mouth but no teeth?

A river!


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