Whatever jokes

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Whatever


incredible confession
 
 
The privacy partition in the confessional booth slides and an excited voice bursts through the screen: "Father, I gotta tell you what happened to me last night. I'm 90 years old, and I made love to two 18 year old women for eight hours last night!"
The stunned priest, replies incredulously, "you did WHAT!"
"I said, I'm 90 years old, and I made love to two eighteen year old women last night for eight hours."
The stern father replies, "boy, I've been waiting all my life for a guy like you. I'm gonna give you a penance like you'll never forget."
To which the voice replies, "Father, you can't give me a penance."
"Why not?" asks the man of the cloth.
"Because I'm Jewish," claims the voice.
The perplexed Father asks, "then why are you telling me?"
"I'm telling everyone!"
english jesus
 
 
Why wasn't Jesus born in Essex, England?

Because they couldn't find three wise men and a virgin!

traffic lights
 
 
Why does a red light turn red?

If you had to change in front of everyone you'd turn red, too.
how do you catch?
 
 
How do you catch a unique animal?

You 'neak up on it.


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