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signs you picked the wrong isp
 
 
10. Their company logo: two tin cans and a length of string.
9. You check out their address, and it's a phone booth containing a Compaq portable and an acoustic coupler.
8. Their chief technical officer lives in a 10-foot-by-7-foot shack in the woods.
7. Their proud boast: "We've been on the Internet since it was CB radio."
6. Their promo materials use the words "information" and "superhighway" in the same sentence.
5. You order an SLIP/PPP connection, e-mail, and 2MB of server space for your personal Web site, and the voice on the other end of the phone asks, "Would you like fries with that?"
4. "As seen in Better Business Bureau special reports."
3. "Access speeds up to 9,600 bps in most areas."
2. They hawk both domain names and Rolexes on street corners.
1. They charge by the word.
parachute vs. condom
 
 
What is the difference between a parachute and a condom?

When a parachute breaks someone dies, when a condom breaks someone lives.
amuse-o-tron
 
 
As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.
knight on a dog
 
 
One day the king of a fairly large country was greeted by a tiny knight. The knight told him the story of how he escaped a battle with a dragon, but his small horse had been killed. He begged the king for a horse, and the king was more than happy to offer him one. The problem, however, was that the knight was too small for the horses the king had. Finally, the king decided to give him a trained Great Dane to ride on. When he presented the Great Dane to the knight, the knight was horrified. He exclaimed, “You would send a knight out on a dog like this?”

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