Whatever jokes

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Whatever


the broccoli
 
 
A guy walked into a restaurant and asked for some broccoli. The waiter said, 'Sorry, there's no broccoli.'

So the man asked for a meat pie and broccoli. The waiter said, "There is no broccoli."

So he asked for a meat pie, chips, and broccoli. The waiter replied, 'Spell cat, as in catastrophe.'

'C-A-T,' the man answered.

The waiter then asked, 'Spell dog as in dogmatic.'

The man said 'D-O-G.'

'Now spell freak, as in broccoli,' the waiter said.

The man yelled 'THERE'S NO FREAK IN BROCCOLI!'

The waiter laughed, 'EXACTLY!!"

antennas
 
 
Did you hear about the two antennas that got married?

The ceremony was long and boring, but the reception was great!
that's really hot
 
 
Which is faster, hot or cold?

Hot -- because you can catch a cold!

lucky number 5
 
 
A 55-year old man, who was born on May 5th, has been married 5 years, has 5 children, makes $55,555.55 a year, and who's lucky number is 5, receives a phonecall from a friend. The friend informs the man that a horse named Lucky 5 will be running in the fifth race at the local track that evening. Excitedly, the man withdraws 5,555.55 cash from his bank account, goes to the races and bets on Lucky 5.

Sure enough, the horse comes in fifth.

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