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wizard of oz
A man jumps off a building at the same time that another man pisses. Which hits the ground first?
The piss, because nobody beats the Wiz!
What do you do when your dishwasher stops?

Kick him in the ass!
riddle: the man
A man lives in a highrise on the 15th floor. Every morning, on the way to work, he takes the elevator all the way down to the 1st floor. But when he comes home, he takes the elevator to the 8th floor and walks the rest of the way up. The only exception is when it's raining. Why?

The man's a midget, and can't reach the buttons. When it's raining, he has his umbrella with him, so he can reach the 15 button with it.

laughing washing machine
Why was the washing machine laughing? Because it was taking the piss out of the pants.

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