Whatever jokes

Jokes » whatever » jokes 239

Whatever


things that make you say damn!
 
 
10) When people go the speed limit in the fast lane

9) When you just can't seem to get a green light when you're in a hurry.

8) When the police speed in regular traffic, but go the speed limit in emergencies.

7) When police or firemen turn their sirens and lights on just to get past the red light.

6) When their is nothing in the fridge when you're hungry, but when you're full, so is the fridge.

5) When, on the toilet, you go to reach for the toilet paper and....

4) Bob Costas.

3) When the gas prices go up in the summer when you need to use the A/C.

2) When the police pull you over, and you realize you forgot to take the reefer out of your ashtray.

1) When you go to pull the trigger to save your own life, and the gun just goes 'click.'
fords
 
 
Did you know, on a cool, still dark night, you can actually hear a FORD rust?
welcome to my place
 
 
Pete and Larry had not seen each other in many years. Now they had a long talk trying to fill in the gap of those years by telling about their lives. Finally Pete invited Larry to visit him in his new apartment.

"I've got a wife and three kids and I'd love to have you visit us."

"Great. Where do you live?"

"Here's the address. And there's plenty of parking behind the apartment. Park and come around to the front door, kick it open with your foot, go to the elevator and press the button with your left elbow, then enter! When you reach the sixth floor, go down the hall until you see my name on the door. Then press the doorbell with your right elbow and I'll let you in."

"Good. But tell me...what is all this business of kicking the front door open, then pressing elevator buttons with my right, then my left elbow?"

"Surely, you're not coming empty-handed."

bugs and teeth
 
 
Q: How do you know how long a guy's been on a motorcycle?

A: Count the bugs in his teeth.

Page 240 of 497     «« Previous | Next »»