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a cop pulls jenna bush over for speeding
 
 
A cop pulls Jenna Bush over for speeding and he notices her eyes are red.

He says, "Gee, your eyes look red. Have you been drinking?"

Jenna replies, "No officer, but gee, your eyes look glazed. Have you been eating doughnuts?

in the groove
 
 
A hippie saunters into an urban Bar & Grill and orders a cheeseburger.

"But make sure to make it not too well done, not too rare, but just in the groove." The waiter is a little annoyed at this, but serves him the burger.

"Waiter!" the hippie says after a little bit. "Could I get a cup of tea? Not too weak, not too strong, but just in the groove." More annoyed now, the waiter contemplates pissing in the tea, but doesn't.

"Waiter!" the hippies says a little later. "Could I get some ice cream? Not too chocolate, not too vanilla, but just in the groove."

"Wait," said the waiter. "I have another idea. How 'bout you kiss my ass? Not too much to the right, not too much to the left, but just in the groove."

your dandruff
 
 
Your dandruff is so bad the principal had to call a snow day!
windows 95
 
 
Windows 95: 32-bit extensions and a graphical shell for a 16-bit patch to an 8-bit operating system originally coded for a 4-bit microprocessor, written by a 2-bit company that can't stand 1 bit of competition.

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