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four catholic mothers
 
 
Four old Catholic women are sitting around bragging about their sons. The first Catholic woman tells her friends "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."

The second Catholic woman chirps, "My son is a bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people call him 'Your Grace'."

The third Catholic mother says "My son is a cardinal. Whenever he walks into a room, he's called 'Your Eminence'."

Since the fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence, the first three women turn to her and say, "Well...?"

So she replies, "My son is 6' 2, terribly handsome with broad, square shoulders... good manners, dresses very well. He's got a tight, muscular body and tight, hard buns and a very nice bulge. Whenever he walks into a room, women say, 'Oh, my God!'"

leper hockey
 
 
Why did the referees stop the leper hockey game?

There was a face-off in the corner.

you can ring my bell, ring my bell
 
 
One upon a time there was a town with a new church steeple with a bell that wouldn't ring. People came from miles around to try it. One day a small fellow came up to the priest and said, “I can do it.”

The priest said, “Okay, try it.”

The little fellow went to the steeple, took three steps back, and ran into the bell with his face. BONG!! The bell rang and he was hired.

One windy day as he took his three steps back to ring the bell, and the wind moved the bell. The little fellow missed the bell and fell out of the steeple. He landed in the middle of the plaza where people gathered to see what happened.

The priest came through the crowd and asked, “Does anyone know this fellow's name?”

Someone in the crowd replied, “I don't know his name, but his face rings a bell!”

k-mart stands for...
 
 
Q: What does K-mart stand for?
A: Kuz Mexicans Are Rich Too


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