Whatever jokes

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the rope
 
 
Did you hear the one about the rope?

Nah, I'll skip it!
racists and lightbulbs
 
 
How many racists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None -- they don't want to be enlightened!

man of the house
 
 
A man and his wife were on their honeymoon. The husband took off his pants and handed them to his wife.

"See if they fit."

"They don't."

"Now you see who will wear the pants in this house." She thought a little while, and took off her panties and asked him to try them on.

"I can't get into these."

"And you won't, either, with that attitude."

grass eater
 
 
A man was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw a man eating grass by the roadside. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate.

"Why are you eating grass?" he asked the man.

"I don't have any money for food," the poor man replied.

"Oh, please come to my house!"

"But sir, I have a wife and four children..."

"Bring them along!" the rich man said.

They all climbed into the limo. Once underway, the poor fellow said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us in."

The rich man replied, "No, you don't understand. The grass at my house is over three feet tall!"


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