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i hit two of my best balls
Eddie came to work Monday and his co-workers asked him how his weekend was. He said he played a little golf. So his co-worker asked him how well he did.

"I hit two of my best balls," he said.

"Tell me about it," said his co-worker.

"I stepped on a rake."

jelly 'n' milk
Why did the jelly wobble?

Because it saw the milk shake!
pro congress?
If con is the opposite of pro, then congress is the opposite of progress?
don't got milk?
What do you call a cow that won't give milk?

A milkdud!

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