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poor mama
 
 
Yo mama so poor, when she went to the 99 cents store she asked for a discount.
in all the land
 
 
Hercules, Snow White and Quasimodo were sitting at a table talking.

Hercules says, "I think I'm the strongest man in the world but it hasn't been proven yet."

Snow White says "I think I'm the fairest lady in the land but it hasn't been proven yet."

Quasie says "I think I'm the ugliest, meanest son of a gun in the world but it hasn't been proven yet."

The next day Hercules and Snow White are sitting at the table.

Hercules says, "It's true I'm the strongest man in the world for God told me so."

Snow White says, "It's true I'm the fairest lady in the land for God told me so."

Just then, Quasi started walking up the road really steamed.

He says, "Guys can you do me a favor? Tell me who the heck is Janet Reno?"

fish eye
 
 
Q: What do you call a fish without an eye?

A: A "FSHhh"

lawyers and blondes, oh my!
 
 
A blonde and a lawyer sit next to each other on a plane. The lawyer asks her to play a game. If he asked her a question that she didn't know the answer to, she would have to pay him five dollars; And every time the blonde asked the lawyer a question that he didn't know the answer to, the lawyer had to pay the blonde 50 dollars. So the lawyer asked the blonde his first question, "What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?" Without a word the blonde pays the lawyer five dollars. The blonde then asks him, "What goes up a hill with four legs and down a hill with three?" The lawyer thinks about it, but finally gives up and pays the blonde 50 dollars. Then the lawyer asked her what the answer was and without a word the blonde gave the lawyer five dollars.

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