Whatever jokes

Jokes » whatever » jokes 96

Whatever


night club
 
 
A guy goes to a nightclub and when the bouncer won't let him in the guy asks, "'Why not?"

"Because you're not wearing a tie," says the bouncer.

"But I have come all the way from the other end of town," says the guy.

"Sorry mate, that's the rules," says the bouncer.

So the guy goes back to his car to try and see if he can find a tie or something like one. He finds a set of jumper cables, ties them around himself, and goes back to the club.

"Is this all right?" he asks the bouncer.

"Well, all right then," replies the bouncer. "But I'll be watching you - don't start anything!"

jolly santa
 
 
Q: Why is Santa always so jolly?

A: Because he knows where all the bad girls live.

californians & granola bars
 
 
How is California like a Granola bar?

They both contain fruits, nuts and flakes!
amputee escaping
 
 
During WWII a fighter pilot was shot down over Germany and he was captured by the Nazis. He was hurt pretty bad so he the German doctor amputated his arm. He had a request that they would drop his arm over his base in England. So the Germans did.

Then next week they amputated his other arm and he asked for the same thing. So the Germans did.

The next week they amputated his leg and he again asked for them to drop it over his base in England.

The German doctor replied, “Nein, Ve do dis no more!” The pilot asked why not, and the German answered, “Ve tink you trying to escape!”


Page 97 of 497     «« Previous | Next »»