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battle of the engineers
 
 
Three engineers were in the bathroom standing at the urinals. The first engineer finished and walked over to the sink to wash his hands. He then proceeded to dry his hands very carefully. He used paper towel after paper towel and ensured that every single spot of water on his hands was dried. Turning to the other two engineers, he said, "At Hewlett Packard, we are trained to be extremely thorough."

The second engineer finished his task at the urinal and he proceeded to wash his hands. He used a single paper towel and made sure that he dried his hands using every available portion of the paper towel. He turned and said, "At Lockheed-Martin, not only are we trained to be extremely thorough, but we are also trained to be extremely efficient."

The third engineer finished and walked straight for the door, shouting over his shoulder, "At Apple Computer, Inc. we don't pee on our hands."


 
 
Q. Why is Al Gore pissed at JFK Jr.?

A. He didn't like him polluting the water.

it was so cold today i saw a lawyer with his ...
 
 
It was so cold today I saw a lawyer with his hands in his own pockets.
hot tomato
 
 
Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!


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