Whatever jokes

The blonde approached and asked if she was all right.

The girl said she was.

A little while later, however, Sandy noticed the girl was in the same spot, still by herself. Approaching again, Sandy offered, "Would you like me to be your friend?"

The girl hesitated, then said, "Okay," looking at the woman suspiciously.

Feeling she was making progress, the blonde then asked, "Why are you standing here all alone?"

"Because," the little girl said with great exasperation, "I'm the goalie!"

So the illustrious leader asks the class for an example of a tragedy. One little boy stands up and offers: "If my best friend who lives on a farm, is playing in the field and a runaway tractor comes along and knocks him dead, that would be a tragedy."

"No," says President Bush, "that would be an accident."

A little girl raises her hand: "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy."

"I'm afraid not," explains the exalted leader. "That's what we would call a great loss."

The room goes silent. No other children volunteer. President Bush searches the room. "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"

Finally at the back of the room, little Johnny raises his hand. In a quiet voice he says: "If Air Force One carrying you was struck by a missile and blown to smithereens, that would be a tragedy."

"Fantastic!" exclaims President Bush, "That's right. And can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?"

"Well," says the boy, "because it sure as hell wouldn't be a great loss and it probably wouldn't be an accident either."

The firefighter says, "Hey little partner, what are you doing?"

The little boy says, "I'm pretending to be a fireman and this is my fire truck."

The firefighter walks over to take a closer look. That's sure is a nice fire truck," the firefighter says with admiration.

"Thanks mister," the boy says.

The fire fighter looks a little closer and notices the boy has tied the wagon to the dog's collar, and to the cat's testicles. The boy says, "You're probably right, mister, but then I wouldn't have a siren."