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cubist poo
 
 
Who is the famous artist with brown fingers?

Pic-ass-o.

shaky arms hotel
 
 
A man and his wife check into a hotel. The husband wants to have a drink at the bar, but his wife is extremely tired so she decides to go on up to their room to rest. She lies down on the bed... just then, and elevated train passes by very close to the window and shakes the room so hard she's thrown out of the bed.  Thinking this must be a freak occurrence, she lies down once more. Again a train shakes the room so violently, she's pitched to the floor.

Exasperated, she calls the front desk, asks for the manager.  The manager says he'll be right up.  The manager is skeptical but the wife insists the story is true.

"Look... lie here on the bed -- you'll be thrown right to the floor!"

So he lies down next to the wife.   Just then the husband walks in. "What," he says, "are you doing here?"

The manager calmly replies, "Would you believe I'm waiting for a train?"

some examples of murphy's law
 
 
Murphy's Law: Whatever can go wrong, will go wrong.
  1. The spouse who snores the loudest always falls asleep first.
  2. The product you are most embarrassed to be buying must be price-checked over the P.A.
  3. The heavier the load, and the farther you must carry it, the more your nose itches.
  4. The original will be found when a replacement is bought.
  5. When you have a deadline, the printer always runs out of toner.
  6. When you have to get up early, the 'snooze' alarm is ten times longer than normal.
  7. Technical instructions are in three languages: Spanish, French, and Geek.
  8. Any Disney movie will be boycotted by some religious union with nothing better to do.
  9. After typing a multi-page report, Windows will perform an 'illegal operation' and erase your work.
  10. Traffic is only bad on days that end in 'y.'
geometry
 
 
Teacher: John, give me a sentence using the word, "geometry."

John: Okay, there once was this little acorn. Then it grew and grew and woke one day and said, 'Gee, I'm a tree.'

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