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Q. Why is Al Gore pissed at JFK Jr.?

A. He didn't like him polluting the water.

it was so cold today i saw a lawyer with his ...
 
 
It was so cold today I saw a lawyer with his hands in his own pockets.
top ten signs your kid is a wizard - david letterm
 
 
10. When he enters a room there is a burst of purple smoke

9. You say, "Do you think that lawn is gonna mow itself?" But then it does

8. Your child gets busted shoplifting a newt

7. Can turn lead into gold, but he can't remember to take out the trash .

6. He wears shiny red satin robes -- and you're just praying he's a wizard

5. Favorite discount electronics chain: The Wiz

4. Refers to Halloween as "amateur night"

3. He's only 12, but somehow he's dating Gwyneth Paltrow

2. His homework ate the dog

1. You catch him in the bathroom polishing his wand

hot tomato
 
 
Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!


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