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sister anne's hot tip
 
 
Sitting by the window in her convent, Sister Anne opened a letter from home and found a $10 bill inside.

As she read the letter she caught sight of a shabbily dressed stranger leaning against a lamppost below.

Quickly she wrote, "Don't despair, Sister Anne" on a piece of paper, wrapped the $10 in it and dropped it out the window.

The stranger picked it up and, with a puzzled expression and a tip of his hat, went off down the street.

The next day Sister Anne was told that a man was at the door, insisting on seeing her. She went down and found the stranger waiting. Without a word, he handed her a roll of bills. "What's this?" she asked.

"That's the 60 bucks you have coming. Don't Despair paid five to one."

wanted: dead or alive
 
 
An office exec was interviewing a blonde for an assistant position, and wanted to find out a little about her personality.

"If you could have a conversation with anyone, alive or dead, who would it be?"

"I'd have to say the living one."

fish tv
 
 
What is a fish's favorite game show?

Name that Tuna.

answering machine
 
 
What did the guy's carphone answering machine say?

'Hi, I'm home right now so I can't take your call.'

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