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the path less traveled
 
 
Q: How does a crazy person travel through the woods?

A: They take the psycho path.
sunbathing
 
 
When should a woman get a suntan?

When the roof blows off the kitchen!
you're so...ugly
 
 
You're so ugly that when you were born the doctor mistook you and the afterbirth for twins.
how to prepare chicken...
 
 
A waiter asks a man, "May I take your order, sir?"

"Yes," the man replies. "I'm just wondering, exactly how do you prepare your chickens?"

"Nothing special, sir. We just tell them straight out that they're going to die."

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