The firefighter says, "Hey little partner, what are you doing?"
The little boy says, "I'm pretending to be a fireman and this is my fire truck."
The firefighter walks over to take a closer look. That's sure is a nice fire truck," the firefighter says with admiration.
"Thanks mister," the boy says.
The fire fighter looks a little closer and notices the boy has tied the wagon to the dog's collar, and to the cat's testicles.
"Help yourself," she replies.
After about an hour and a half visit, he gets up to leave and notices that he has eaten almost all of the peanuts in the bowl. "I apologize," he says to the elderly lady. "I only meant to eat a few."
"That's okay," says the lady, "Since I've lost my teeth, all I've been able to do is suck the chocolate off of them."
The Texan lady commented, "Well, isn't that nice?"
The lady from Mississippi continued, "When my second child was born, my husband bought me that fine Cadillac automobile you see parked in the drive."
Again, the Texas lady commented, "Well, isn't that nice?"
The first woman boasted, "Then, when my third child was born, my husband bought me this exquisite diamond bracelet."
Yet again, the Texas lady commented, "Well, isn't that nice?"
The first woman then asked her companion, "What did your husband buy for you when you had your first child?"
The Texas lady replied, "My husband sent me to charm school."
"Charm school!" the first woman cried. "Land sakes, child, what on Earth for?"
The Texas lady responded, "So that instead of saying, 'Who gives a crap,' I learned to say, 'Well, isn't that nice?'"
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