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The second engineer finished his task at the urinal and he proceeded to wash his hands. He used a single paper towel and made sure that he dried his hands using every available portion of the paper towel. He turned and said, "At Lockheed-Martin, not only are we trained to be extremely thorough, but we are also trained to be extremely efficient."
The third engineer finished and walked straight for the door, shouting over his shoulder, "At Apple Computer, Inc. we don't pee on our hands."
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The sky was dark,
The moon was high,
All alone,
Just her and I.
Her hair so soft,
Her legs so fine,
I ran me fingers,
down her spine.
I didnt know how,
I tried my best,
To touch her breast.
I remembered my fear,
But slowly she spread,
Her legs apart,
And when she did,
I felt no shame.
All at once,
The white stuff came out!
At last. It's finished.
It's all over...
My first time,
Milking a cow.
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9. You say, "Do you think that lawn is gonna mow itself?" But then it does
8. Your child gets busted shoplifting a newt
7. Can turn lead into gold, but he can't remember to take out the trash .
6. He wears shiny red satin robes -- and you're just praying he's a wizard
5. Favorite discount electronics chain: The Wiz
4. Refers to Halloween as "amateur night"
3. He's only 12, but somehow he's dating Gwyneth Paltrow
2. His homework ate the dog
1. You catch him in the bathroom polishing his wand
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