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the native american clock
 
 
One day, there was a cowboy riding a horse in the desert. He came along this native American layin' naked with a hard-on, so the cowboy decided to ask the N. American, 'What are you doing, why are you layin there naked?'

The N. American replies, 'I'm finding out the time.'

So the cowboy's like, 'Well then, what time is it?'

The N. American replies 'its 12:15.'

The cowboy looks at his watch and thought, "Wow he's pretty good. It really is 12:15."

The cowboy continues on a few hours and sees another N. American laying naked on the ground with a hard-on. So again he asks, what he is doing. The N. American replies'

I'm seeing what time it is.'

The cowboy asks him what time it was, and the N. American answered, "it's 3:15."

The cowboy looked at his watch and he too had the correct time. The cowboy continued moseying on and he finds a third N. American laying naked on the ground with a hard-on, EXCEPT this guy is jerking off.

The cowboy, leans over and asks what he was doing and the N. American replied, "I'm winding my watch."'

dead donkey
 
 
A clergyman awoke one morning to find a dead donkey in his front yard. He had no idea how it got there, but he knew he had to get rid of it.
He called the sanitation department, the health department, and several other agencies, but no one seemed able to help him.

In desperation, the good reverend called the mayor and asked what should be done. The mayor must have been having a bad day. 'Why bother me?' he asked. 'You're a clergyman. It's your job to bury the dead.'

The pastor lost his cool. 'Yes,' he snapped, 'But I thought I should at least notify the next-of-kin.'

cleansing
 
 
Why'd the robber take a bath?

So he could make a clean getaway!
voices! voices! shut up!
 
 
A teacher asked a pupil a question, but she could barely hear the child speaking since the other kids were making too much noise. In an attempt to quiet them, she said, 'I can hear voices!'

Two janitors outside heard the teacher and one said to the other, 'Jeez, she better stop telling the kids about her mental problems!'


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